Sunday, 3 July 2011

My Hayley Williams Story :D

Hayley Williams.

Hayley Williams wears all kinds of clothes including her favourite “security” shirt. Her and her band Paramore travels all around touring. When she is on stage, she uses a microphone in the shape of an orange stick thing. Hayley’ s hair is naturally a dirty blond but she has a reddish orange colour.

Hayley and Paramore have just been around Australia and are now in America. Hayley lives and grew up in Nashville Tennesesee in America but lives around the world in their tour bus, she is currently in a relationship with Chad from the band New Found Glory, but she likes me as well.

Her house in America has a large living room with a indoor swimming pool with a 2000cm plasma t.v. On her walls there are photos of me. She has a massive studio where they play. she also has a trophy room where she has her award of #2 sexiest woman in music. She has all her past concert t-shirts framed on the walls.

I come to her house and knocked on her door. She was so happy to see me because she loves me so much. We spoke for 47 hours then she told me that I am touring with Paramore forever. So I said “Ok” and went for a swim in her swimming pool when suddenly she asked me to move in with her. But then i said “ only if you reply to my twitter.

So she said no. So it was all over between me and hayley. As I was walking out the door she was pleading me to stay because she loves me.

The next day it was raining. I decided to move in with her so that i could become rich. She told me that were going to Mexico for 18 weeks to play for 3 hours. We got there and then suddenly Zac the drummer died in a terrible wheelbarrow incident. So i had to step in and play the drums infront of Mexico. After the show, I was payed $43 million for the drummer role. I had 14 tacos then we went back to America.

By this time I was a billionare and Travie McCoy made a song about me. We were in recession but then i took a crack at it. I was thinking about pulling an Angelina and Brad Pitt and adopt a bunch of babies that ain’t ever had stuff. But I decided not to because Hayley and i were planning to have our own babies.

I was speaking to Hayley about makeing a new song called “I love you “ and the songs lyrics are, “ I love you, I love you” 508 times over. It made number 1 on the charts and I made over 57 billion $$$. At this time I was the richest person in the planet. Bill Gates got jealous and tryed to kidnap Hayley. So I shot him in the head. I stole his wallet witch contained $$$ 25 billion and got his credit card and got the remaining 27 billion $$$. I was on the run from the police for about 27 minutes, then decided to go back home because I was bored. I Hid bills dead body among my millions of $$$ so that nobody would find it.

Hayley’s and my money joined together made 100 billion $$. We didn’t know what to do with the money so we decided to buy Japan. It only cost us 99 billion but dont worry because we have more gigs to make money. We played in Tokyo in front of 32 million people, the tickets were $3 each. So we made 90 million or something.

The next night I spend 300 million $$$ on dinner with Hayley. This money included a wedding ring and marriage costs. This is the night that im going to... eat a whole lobster. So I proposed to her and she said yes. I gave her the $250mil dollar 24 carrot gold ring with a massive full diamond on it. We were to get married at Nashville.

On wedding day. I wore Orange tuxedo. She looked great walking down the Isle to Paramores “The Only Exception.” After the vowls there was a 24metre long limo waiting outside. We got in and there was a dance floor with a karaoke machine. We pulled up to Gerard Way’s house. He was with his wife Bettina setting up the after wedding party. There was an exspected 4 people showing up. It was going to go off. But because were so popular heaps of other people showed up.

Some of the people that showed up were Jarod Leto, Lisa and Jess Veronica, Taylor Swift, M.Shadows and the rest of Paramore.

After i signed autographs for them all because im so much more popular now, Hayley and I were talking about babies. So we went to Canada to perform our songs to some people. When we were there, we found a bed shop. We brought 2 pillows each and headed down the the Drums shop to buy some drums. There wasn’t a drums that we liked so we asked the worker guy and he took us out the back. as we were waiting for him to come back, there was an awkward silence between Hayley and I. So we decided to try for a baby right now. While we were, we broke 3 drum kits. The man came back, we brought the drums then left.

3 minutes later Hayley found out she was pregnant. We stayed in Canada for 8 months and 3 weeks then got on a plane back for America. About 18 minutes into the flight, I saw a cloud. Then 5 minutes after that, she had a baby boy. When we were trying to think of the name, another one popped out. This one was a girl. After a long hour of thinking of names we called the boy Hercules and the girl Robyn.

When we got back to America we only had 20 mins until we had to get back onto a plane headed for Sweedan. So we hired 2 massive body guards to look after the kids. When we got to the airport Hayley was angry, So I bought her a hotdog and went to our Hotel. Then we went onto stage infront of Sweedan. Halfway through our song “I love you”, I played the drums wrong. Hayley got angry and walked of the stage. So I tryed to sing but I got booed of the stage. Or maybe they were just booing because Hayley left, because I am a great singer. After the gig she yelled at me and went back to America. So I was stuck in Sweedan with only the money we got from the gig, witch was around $ 2 000 000. I couldn’t afford a plan ticket back so I brought a house in Sweedan.

I lived in Sweedan by myself for a year. I was going to commit suicide but then I saw a guy on his bike, which inspired me to go back to America to see Hayley and the kids. When knocked on the door. Some random opened the door and said hi. We had a nice long conversation but this wasent where Hayley lived anymore. I rang her and she told me that she moved to Sweedan. She moved their 4 days after she left me. I asked her adress and she said 74 Chocolate Avenue. And my house address is 76 chocolate avenue. So for a year, we were living next to each other. So I gave her 1 million $$$ and we moved back together in Sweedan.

for the next year spent in Sweedan, our property, Japan had made $300billion for us. So we decided to upgrade our house. It was going to be the biggest house ever invented in history. We were thinking to make it 80 storys high, but decided that was too much, so we made it 10. It was a kilometer in length which included our private airport. The bottom floor is for the kids. It has a lollypops playland where you can come for a party or come for a play. The second story was the studio. It had a stage with instruments and microphones, also there was a movie theater with 6 screens. The next 8 floors i cant be bothered to talk about. The backyard has a rollercoaster, an aquarium, with sharks and a water ride that goes through the aquarium. It took around 3 minutes to build but as we got in, Paramore got invited to go to Turkey to play with New Found Glory.

On the Plane, we watched a movie. When we got to the gig, Chad wasent there. we later found out that he commited suicide because Hayley chose me instead of him. I dident really care cause. She is amazing.

The next day we went to America to enter Robyn and Hercules , at the age of 1 ½ to go in X-factor as a duo, but they lost. So we went back to America. When we got back, there was a letter in our 20 metre letter box inviting us to the internation kids choice awards night. It said on the invitation it was in England but it was actually on our 7th floor in our house. So we were a bit late. The first award was for most ugly baby. It was between Hercules Geddes- Williams, the child of Jack Black and Pauline Hanson and the child of Mr. Bean and Kesha. And Hercules wins. And by the way Hercules and Robyn are not identical twins, so its o.k. The next award was for the most amazing baby in the world. the nomones were Robyn Geddes- Williams, Taylor Swift and Jared letos kid and Gerard and Bettina Way. And Robyn wins. All the people got angry and started to trash our 7th floor. The wall made of pure lego was nearly broken but luckly our body guards/ babysitters came to the rescue. After 20 minutes of chaos, I told everyone to stop, so they did and went home. I had dinner that night on my own 500m sushi train with 50 Asian sushi makers. It was fun. I was depressed that night so I went to the 10th floor and jumped off, Into my 100m deep pool. I did a Quadriple back turn twist sumersault and got perfect 10’s from my personal diving judges. Then I went to bed. The next 10 years nothing happenenened so im not writing about it.

10 years later. The kids are 11 and Hayley and I are 25. After the 10 years, Japan had given us 900 billion $$$. So we bought 9000 airplanes for our new international airport. At this time, Hercules was a hooooge body builder and was growing up to be a God. Robyn is already a multi-million dollar roadie for the band Vampires raped my baby. after loosing x-factor at the age of 2. She has entered it again for the last 10 years and won them all. Hercules and Robyn are both older now, so we decided to go on holiday to Italy for 3 months. While we were there, we ate pizza and I made my first single called “ I have the best daughter in the world,” it reached number 1 for 18 years straight and won 27 grammys and 30 MTV movie awards.

Paramore decided to write a new album called Paramore. Each person in the family had 2 songs each. Robyn’s were “ I love Tea” and “Don’t poke your tongue out at me Einstein.” Hercules’ were ‘ Go the distance” and zero to hero”. Hayleys were “ I love Matt” and “ I’m Pregnant”. Mine were “Hello” and “Hayley”. Then suddenly, Hayley had a baby boy named Zeno- Rainbow Geddes- Williams. He was born at the age of 10. The album was so good that it cosy $300 per album and to download it for free it was $100. We were inducted into the music hall of fame and sold 7 billion copies. Every single person in the world bought a copy.

My favourite child, Robyn, became solitary champion of the world by the age of 13. She holds the record of most games played. To celebrate, we went on a worldwide tour with the Aquabats and Die Antwoord.

Our worldwide tour took 1 week then we came back home, but our home was gone. We thought it had been struck down by lightning, but then relized it was eaten by a dinosaur.

I walked over to the letterbox and looked inside. There was a letter from the grim reaper telling me I was going to die in 5 minutes. So I got my gun out that I hadn’t used since killing Bill Gates. I saw Mr. Reaper and said hi. I was in the middle of watching Home and Away so he waited until after the show. As he was about t reap me, I shot him in the head. 14times. but he chopped my foot off. I started crying then he felt bad and went home. Then the was a flood.

When I was in hospital getting my foot sewn on , Hayley had another baby girl called Rebecca and then another boy called Madison and then a boy called Gender and another girl called Seven.

We went to Disney Land @ California to go on rides. Our 7 kids came as well. Robyn and Hercules are not 14 so they went on the rides with us. We snuck the rest of the kids on but they all fell off when we were on a loop. They all died instantly except for Madison, who lived for an extra 5 seconds and Rebecca survived and went to hospital. We went on 3 more rides then went to visit her. When we got their, she wasent there but then she was their so we said hello. We were told she had lost her left leg. So we went back to disneyland and found it. Then we went back to give it too her but it wasent her leg. So she got a mechanical one and had to stay in hospital for 18 years. We said bye then left. She also said goodbye. As I was walking out I fell over and broke my neck, so they gave me a wheelchair and we went home. But we don’t have a home because it was eaten so we went to move in with Mike Posner. He is such a loser but we needed a house. The first night we were there i poisoned his drink. But before he took a sip, Hercules drank it all. He died but because hes god hes alive again. I didn’t want to risk killing Hercules again so I shot him in the head. The last words he said was “you think your cooler than me.”

We then sewed Disneyland for all that they are worth witch was 18 million + Disneyland, we hired a lawyer for 1 million $$$ a day so that we could definatly win.

The trail went on for 3 days and we ended up winning 18$$$million + Disneyland + we got our kids back. Hayley then had another 2 babies named Courtney and Amy. We now had 9 and was getting really hard to look after them. So we adopted 5 african boys from the adoption place. There names are Azizi, Jaafer, Maalik, Naasir and Odongo. They were all 18 and 4 days after adopting them they moved out and was multi-million dollar home in Africa. Oh and my middle name is Aurek.

We then went on tour with the Script. Taylor and Jeremy died in a freak accident involving guitars. The Josh died from a meteorite so Paramore was over. Hayley and I joined the Script. The scripts singer and drummers died so we slotted in easily. We re-named the band The Paramore. or Parascript. or Scriptmore . We made the script or Parascript or Scriptmore or the paramore go really good. Then i saw Rebecca on the street. She was wearing a mechanical leg. So we went back to mikes house (but its our house now.)...

1 hour later, Robyn got a new job as a Zumba instructor with Rebecca as the creator/ superviser.
Then we decided to play a game of dominoes. the order was Hayley- Me- Hercules- Robyn- ZenoRainbow- Rebecca, Madison, Gender, seven Courtney and then Amy. We all fell over then we got up and Hercules broke his neck and leg but because hes a god, he healed himself and Madison broke her neck and her back and her finger. She was in so much pain that he died. So we had a funeral at KFC. It was sad so we got free KFC. So then we brought the store and went home. The window was opaque.

We then had a meeting with the owner of Australia. His name is Kieran. We were negotiating Japans cost and Australias cost when suddenly one of my adopted African kids, Azizi fell out of a plane in Australian and landed on the centrepoint tower. So Kieran had to clean him up. He never wanted it to happen again so I traded My Tokyo for his Australia. Then I brought China. I learnt karate then went home.

I then told Hayley I love her for the first time in 22 years. but we are still 25. I forget the kids ages so they can be 10 except for Robyn and Hercules who are 16.

The band decided to make a new song. Hayley is amazing so she took all the credit for it and I got jealous so I kidnapped her. but it wasent really a kidnapping because I took her home. It was about 3am and on our way home got lost. We were in the middle of the forest when we found this homeless girl called Ellen who had a tent. but I guess she had a tent so shes not homeless. She let us stay in her tent because it was a 12 bedroom 2 bathroom tent. In the morning we paid her $3mil for rent and went.

Seeing Robyn and Hercules are 16 we decided they could get there drivers licence. So Hercules had the first go with Me, Robyn, hayley and him in the car. We went on the freeway and crashed and all died except for Hercules. But because hes a god he made us all come back to life. So the next time it was Robyns turn. We got in our black 1967 Chevy Impala whatever that is. So we got in, moved a metre and slammed into a tree. then got out fine but when I took my first step out of the car I slipped over and smashed my face into the ground. I broke my legs and was back in a wheelchair.

Then Hayley and I left to go to africa for 2 weeks to see our kids. It turned out Odongo is the new president of Africa and Azizi is dead. Jaufer is a homeless man and has no friends. When we saw them they didn’t know who we were. So they kidnapped us. Math is infinite. So we were stuck in Africa. We took 1 step outside our cage then an alarm went off and we got chased by tigers and koalas. So we went back into the cage.

3 years later, still stuck in Africa, we found a door on one of the walls. So we went in. We found a 5 star hotel with an airport. We got on a plane and went back to America. At home, the time is 2072 for your information.

After a fun night, Hayley was pregnant again. We decided to see if it was a boy or girl. When we got there the doctor told us that she was going to give birth to 8 kids, We definitely could not look after all of them. We asked to get an abortion but it was too late, they started walking out. We paniced so we brought them all hotdogs and they were fine. We had no idea what to do with them. We gave them really lame names then sold them to people. Seeing they were only 0 years old, we sold them for cheap. $10 each was the price. But we kept one. But then he died. We really wanted to keep another one. So we took a look on ebay for some good quality and no shipping costs. We found this guy who was 16. His name was Xenoxia Anderson. he was Asian and played ping pong. When he came in the mail he entered a table tennis tournament and won. His ebay cost was $3mill but he just won $5 mil in the tournament. Then we worked out his dad was Jackie Chan. His mum stole him and put him on ebay and Jackie wanted him back. But I said sorry no refunds. Then we had a karate – off. I died and he stole Xenoxia. Hayley was crying because she loves me so much but the Hercules got me back to life. Hayley wanted to spend more time with me because she loved me even more when I died. So we decided to go on a holiday to Iraq.

In Iraq, we saw Eminem. He was singing a song then we joined in. He was angry so he shot me in the finger. I was bleeding heaps and there was no hospitals in Iraq.